Let’s start with the setting. The battle took place high atop the Santa Monica Mountains. The rough temperature was near 110 degrees. Then there was myself, a lone hiker daring to take on the heat and insane elevation gain.
Now the battle. As I round the last corner of the hike I see my goal. A strange and bazar sandstone formation that overlooks the Pacific ocean and city of Malibu. All of a sudden I hear it. A sinister sound, rattle rattle rattle. I stop! Look down and see him. The 3 foot long beast of a rattle snake. We stare eye to eye for what seems like hours.
Whoosh a flash of light….
Then all of a sudden he perks up as if to prepare to strike… I do what any man would do. Take off my shoe and throw it at the beast. He dodges and hisses back at me. As if to mock my failed attack. I then jump back and grab my next weapon. A 4 foot long stick. I think to my self. He is 3 feet long and I have a 4 foot long stick. He still has the upper hand. At this point I really needed to assess my options. Fight the beast and reach my goal or run away and live to hike another day. I decided, fight the beat. So we went for it. I swung and he took a strike at me. Then again and again. A true battle of man vs animal. I am not sure why this happened but I decided that the stick was not the tool for the job. I threw the stick as hard as possible and charged the snake. The stick connects!!! And I tackle the snake in it’s confusion. I grab right behind his jaw and we roll around. He rattles and I roar. He wraps around me and squeezes tight as if to suck the life from me. I start to loose it. The battle is turning to his favor. Then I take one drastic move. We roll down the mountain. At some point during this 300 foot fall I manage to gain dominance of the snake and believe it or not tear his head from his snaky body with my teeth. I then stand a roar like a man..
Whoosh another flash of light, then I woke up….
Then all of a sudden he perks up as if to prepare to strike… I do what any sane man would do. Take two steps backwards then run as fast as I could down the hill. It took me around 10 min to run about 2 miles down the mountain. When I arrived back at my jeep I stared at the top in sadness as I was almost there. Shortly after my frown turned into a smirk and I decided next weekend your mine snake.